Sometimes I feel so lost that I want to cry. I feel like there's nothing for me here. I think about how busy my life would be if I had my son here. It's sad because I wanted that busyness so bad. I wanted to spend every waking moment being his mom and raising him and just enjoying having him. Now I just don't want what it is I'm suppose to be doing. I'm in school right now but there's so much more that's missing. I know nothing can fill that void from losing my baby but I hope God brings something in my life worth being excited for.
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